A letter is better
By Marilyn Loeser

For centuries we’ve jotted down our thoughts, feelings and dreams in a letter and mailed them to our loved ones. So what happened to the simply pen to paper correspondence over the last few decades?
E-mail seems to be the biggest reason — it seems easier and there’s no fee attached. But don’t be so quick to dismiss an “old-fashioned” letter for an e-mail. More and more correspondence is being sent on fine stationary, note cards and greeting cards by those wanting to reconnect with their family and friends scattered across the country and around the world.
The letter revisited
In Victorian times, letter writing was a formal operation. There were letters of apology, congratulations and introduction. The Victorian housewife was judged by her letter writing skills and she never used abbreviations because it might appear she had written the letter in haste.
But — as Emily Post pointed out in Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at Home — by 1922 scarcely 10 percent of the mail included personal letters or invitations. “The art of general letter-writing in the present day is shrinking until the letter threatens to become a telegram, a telephone message, a post-card.”
Post blames the decline on newspapers transmitting news with far greater accuracy, detail and dispatch which was “the chief reason for letters of the stage-coach and sailing-vessel days, and has no part in the correspondence of today.”
The early 20th century may have seen a significant decline in letter and card writing, but in the first decade of the 21st century, there seems to be a renewed interest. In 2007, December 17 was the busiest mailing day with more than 275 million holiday cards and letters postmarked.
For many, at the end of the work day, going home and checking e-mail isn’t always high on the priority list. But, according to the Postal Service, 98 percent of Americans check to see if they got any mail.
Finding a personal note or letter among the magazines and pizza coupons is always a pleasant surprise, especially when you think about how they took the time to share their personal news, address the envelope and put it in a postal collection box. And a letter can be enjoyed over and over again.
In The Art of Correspondence: Letter Writing 101, Mary Mitchell writes, “Not one modern communications marvel can replace a letter. It is more than a communication. It is a gift. A letter can have special powers. It can be more intimate and touching than even a conversation. It can be more personal than any telephone call.”
Think of the history that would be lost if letters hadn’t been written and treasured? The historic books John Adams by David McCullough and Benjamin Franklin: An American Life by Walter Isaacson are two examples where correspondence played a major part in piecing together these men’s lives. Personal correspondence brings out the personality and perspective of the writer as well as the letter’s recipient. Current events, customs and traditions become more apparent — whether the letter is from a historic figure or our own ancestors.
I recently came across a letter my father wrote to my mother in 1962 when he was away on business. It touched my heart to read my father’s words of how much he missed her and how he couldn’t wait to get back home to his family. Although my father passed away more than 20 years ago, my mother, 91, treasures this letter and the letters he sent to her during WW II when he was fighting in the Pacific. I read in these letters their love, his sense of duty to his country and my mother’s optimism that he would safely return to her.
Why don’t we send more letters?
Although time could be a factor, I think it’s more the fear of not saying the right thing. In this age of text messaging and quick e-mails, the thought of actual paragraphs can be frightening. To the rescue are books that offer ideas on what to write for every occasion — sympathy, thank you, congratulations and other occasions when a letter is the best way to convey a sentiment.
We’re just out of practice.
My mother always says, “If you want mail, you have to send mail.” And she’s right. If I want the pleasure of cards and letters in my mailbox, I have to send them.
Just write what you’d say if you were talking face to face. A letter doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. Just a Thinking of You card with a few lines saying you and your family are fine is all it takes to start a string of correspondence with someone you’d like to reconnect with.
Kind regards, hugs, sincerely, take care, love, write back soon…
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